Posts Tagged ‘Janikowski’


December 21, 2010

And then there were two. The second week of the playoffs is in the books and everything has gone according to plans if you look at the seedings. One and two both advanced and we have the matchup of the two best teams in the Super Bowl. This is by no means the way it always happens, but 2010 is the year of the favorites. Speaking of favorites, cheerleaders are nice too. See video above.

1ST SEED-THE DOGDER V 6TH SEED-SPINE SNAPPERS – After battling through the first round of the playoffs, the Spine Snappers had to make all the right moves to get past the one seed, a tall task. Let’s just make it short and sweet; they did not make all the right moves. It started with a bagel from the TE on Thursday night and only got worse. The coaching call in question was benching Maclin against the Giants in favor of Garcon, who was on a hot streak and facing a porous Jags defense. Well, that did not work out so well, in fact it was enough to be eliminated from the playoffs. The Dodger needed only 7 points from his kicker Robbie Gould, a not so easy task in the snow in Minnesota, but the chore proved easy enough to rain a Gould-en shower all over the Spine Snappers for 16 points. Ray Rice was another MAJOR cog in that wheel for The Dodger as he went off for his best performance of the year aside from Week 5 against Denver. This will be crucial in the next game, which is for all the marbles. THE DODGER 126 – SPINE SNAPPERS 116

2nd SEED-BASSTURDZ V 4TH SEED-TEAM MEXICO – Team Mexico was riding a wave into Round 2 of the playoffs. Beers poppin’, bowls loaded, potential opponents being called out, the world was his oyster, time for a return to glory after last year’s Super Bowl disappointment. So confident was Team Mexico that he spearheaded the effort to eliminate the 3rd place game, which has always paid the buy in for the victor. Then of course there’s the old adage, “that’s why they play the games.” It was at this time that all the candy fell out of TM’s piñata, nobody showed up. Meanwhile, Bassturdz got major work out of a team of 7. TO went out, Gates was out and Heap of shit didn’t play, didn’t matter to the Bassturdz. No drama; just points. Ball game BASSTURDZ 107 – TEAM MEXICO 64


1ST SEED-THE DODGER V 2ND SEED-BASSTURDZ – Well well well, one v two for the freaking trophy. This one should be very interesting. We know Matty Ice will be a slinging the ball around the field against New Orleans on Monday night. The question is, will Brady be doing the same thing against Buffalo? Or will he be on the bench by halftime because the Pats have already locked up their playoff position? If you look at matchups, The Dodger has the more favorable matchups for his players; see MJD @ Washington and Rice @ Cleveland. Bassturdz have an edge at WR, as both Colston and Andre Johnson are playing at a high level. Foster is hurt so look for Schaub to find Johnson a lot against a sorry Denver team, Champ Bailey be damned. Oakland is playing Indy so McFadden will get loose, but Oakland has a decent secondary and LBs, so will Tamme get loose? As for the defenses, flip a coin, both are playing lousy opponents, but the Cowboys had a hard time stopping Rex Grossman. Pats had a hard time against young Matt Flynn too, but edge goes to the Patriots. Both Teams are 9-5 going into the Super Bowl, but only one can emerge with the magical 10th win. Handicapping the big one is tough; edge The Dodger.

Now who wants to play the bridesmaid Spine Snappers for a case of beer?




November 16, 2010

Let me just start by saying that Coach Brown WILL NOT give up without a fight…as long as that means you can count fighting with members of the media. Anyhooooo, let’s get down to the business at hand. Sorry for the spotty recaps this year, I know it’s tough when your team whips an ass one week and you don’t get your congratulatory pat on the ass. Nice job kid, keep up the good work. Three short weeks left in the regular season and only six can go through to the postseason. Everyone perceives that they have a chance, but not for long.

THE GREENS (7-3) V BASSTURDZ (6-4) – All good things must come to an end, and for The Greens, that meant the three game streak that vaulted him to the top of the standings with 7 wins was squashed at the hands of the Turdz. It all began Thursday when the Bassturdz played 43 with Matthews to The Greens 3 with Turner; party started. Scrappy Fitzpatrick was not able to get it done this time and Marshall is kind of a head case, so it was difficult for the Greens to keep smoking. Andre Johnson did what he does and the Bassturdz started Janikowski even though he was on his bye week, tripping on X and canoodling with Russian strippers. Nice gig.

TEAM MEXICO (6-4) V EASY RIDERS (3-7) – Speaking of smoking, Team Mexico is on fire. After starting 1-4, the beans have ripped off 5 straight wins to vault themselves well into playoff contention. This time on the arm of Flacco. The scary part is that if he could have picked the right QB each week, he’d be leading the league in points by a mile. For the Easy Riders, the road gets pretty rough going forward, all must win games. I’m sure Peyton Manning NOT throwing a touchdown pass was purely an aberration, expect more in week 11.

CANUCKS (6-4) V TIMID PUPPIES (4-6) – Very ironic that the two highest scoring teams in the league have mirror opposite records. Timid Puppies last two games have been explosions of points, 276 in two games, and he’s getting them from the entire starting lineup. Depth for this squad is another subject entirely. The Canucks are right in the mix as usual and in fact put up a pretty decent score after Mike Wallace’s big performance on Sunday night. But it wouldn’t be enough. This theme continued in Week 10 for another team.

THE DODGER (6-4) V SPINE SNAPPERS (5-5) – In What appeared to be a lopsided game, The Dodger trailed 131-87 after all the afternoon games had been played. With only one player left, Ben Gropethisfurburger, it was looking bleak for The Dodger. And after one half of play, the QB had only amassed 5 points. But in a tale of two halves, the Steelers mounted a comeback, not unlike Big Ben in a bathroom, and when the dust settled, The Dodger had a 7 point lead going into MNF. Spine Snappers needed yards and a TD from Maclin to make it to the .500 mark and got it right before halftime. Michael Vick came out of the gates like rabid dog and the Eagles scored 5 TDs in the first half. Tough to lose when you score more than 7 other teams. But fantasy football is like that.

SOMEHWERE OVER D-WAYNE BOWE (4-6) V EARMUFFS (3-7) – This game could be, no, in fact it is the comeback of the season. Going in to MNF, Earmuffs trailed 83-28 and it looked all but certain that SODWB would snap his 3-game slide. But as we all know, you’re always in it if you have a dog in the fight…especially if his name is Mike Vick. Vick put up a season high 72 points, which would have been enough to win it, but Earmuffs also has McCoy, who added another 15 for good measure. SODWB’s waiver wire QB turned out nicely, but the double Tights experiment backfired as Pettigrew and Gonzales both shit the bed. This can be a brutal game.